Maria Menounos

How Friendships Affect Our Lives & Ending Toxic Friendships with Erin Falconer

Author of “How To Break Up With Your Friends” Erin Falconer joins the Heal Squad to share the link between your friendships and your productivity. Through research and analyzing her own relationships, Erin created a guide to fostering better connections with those in your life. Today she shares with us how friendships affect our lives in many different ways, including our health, and teaches us tools to cultivate stronger bonds with those we love.  

1. The connection between friendship and productivity

If a friendship isn’t giving you energy, it is taking it and robbing you of energy that you could have used to be productive. So, it is important to take stock and observe which friendships are propelling you foard and which are holding you back. 

2. How friendship can boost productivity 

So many of us are guilty of putting friendships on the back burner while on “the grind”. We sometimes see hanging out with friends as wasted time that could be used to work towards our goals. Erin says that actually, meaningful interactions with friends is foundational to productivity. Light-weight fun prevents burnout and gives you the energy needed to work hard. 

3. Legacy friends 

Do you have that friend who has been in your life forever, but feel like you’ve outgrown? You aren’t alone! We grow and evolve and so do our friends, and sometimes we don’t grow together and that’s completely fine.  

4. How friendships can affect health

A study found that the time we spend with our loved ones is the single most important determinant on how long we will live. Soon, doctor’s will begin to ask about your socialization patterns just as they ask if you smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol. That is not directly friendship can impact your health. 

5. How to approach a friend you are upset with

While it may be uncomfortable, you should tell your friend how you are feeling. When you do, don’t play the blame game but share how their actions are making you feel. You will feel so much lighter and you will be freeing up a lot of energy that can be put towards being productive. 

6. Friendships are relationships

You make a commitment when you are in a friendship. If you have a friend who cancels every time and doesn’t put effort in, there is no relationship. Think about it like this: if you were dating your friend and they acted this way, would you keep dating them?  

7. Your part in toxic friendships 

If you are annoyed with a friend’s behavior but keep letting them do it without saying anything, you are enabling that pattern. You teach people how to treat you. If someone is late every time you hang out and you don’t speak up about it, you are co-creating the situation. 

8. You aren’t burdening your friends with your problems

Talking to your friends about your hardships is the highest pinnacle of respect in a relationship. Being vulnerable with someone is one of the most telling signs of a strong friendship, and they will feel honored that you trust their opinion enough to ask for help or advice. 

Listen to the full interview here:

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